03/04/2003
This is a review of lifeisbeauty.diaryland.com.
Content - 47/65
[-]Execution - 20/35pts. I have a habit of reading people's first few diary entries before jumping around. (Unless I'm greeted with someone resembling John Keats or something of the sort. Then I drink slowly and yummifully.) And your first entry told me that you're a drama queen! That you want to be introspective and true to yourself, and you aren't going to tell anyone about the diary because you want to be introspective and true to yourself. Goodie. You're going to try to mimic a real diary in a public forum. This is hard for you. I'm drooling because I know that this is hard and that makes the review fun.
I wanted you to get dirty and personal, which you didn't in your first few entries, so I began to skim... and skimming isn't a good sign, especially when nothing about the rest of your content bothered me all that much.
Anyway, I wrote that sentence, and as if you could read my mind, you announced a dirty secret. I perked right up. (SEX!!!) But you just skipped work. *yawn.* Can't you even pretend to be unhappy or lovelorn or suicidal? Or something? You skipped work. And you drank coffee. Humph. I was sorely disappointed since, of course, there is little soul-searching with skipping work and drinking coffee.
But your diary isn't annoying (aside from that irritating hot pink), so congratulations! You've failed at your purpose, which is, of course, a great offense, but then you regale us with airplane stories. Or you regaled me anyway. (This universal "we" gets to be a bit annoying, doesn't it?) And, really, if your diary were for entertainment, you'd do a spankin' good job, most of the time.
[-]Grammar/Mechanics - 9/10pts. Yep. I caught one or two spelling errors, but overall, you know how to write in English.
[-]Readability - 10/10pts. No slang! Very good!
[-]Style - 8/10pts. This means you can string words together without sounding like a pompous jackass or a retarded anime kid who watches too much (you guessed it!) anime. I docked points because you seem to be "telling" more than "showing." And sometimes, it's as though that horrible stalker's watching over your shoulder again. Or maybe you just don't have anything interesting to say. Anyway, your style is good, but not Keats. Only Keats and I can score a "ten" on this bit.
Layout - 16/20pts.
[-]Aesthetics - 10/10pts. Pretty and colorful, although a bit too bright, but I docked points off elsewhere for that bit. It was enough to make me want to complain here too though but not enough to count off points.
[-]Navigability - 5/5pts. G'job.
[-]Legibility - 1/5pts. Anything against that bright pink of the background of the entries hurts my eyes. Please, darling, use normal colors for what we have to spend a long time reading.
Contact - 5/5pts. Three forms should be plenty for even the most curious of stalkers.
Updates - 5/5pts. You've got more than ten a month, every month. The main thing is to not leave for six months at a time, and you've succeeded. Good show!
Errors - 5/5pts. You've none.
Total - 78/100pts. This of course means that you're labeled as one of "the Mediocre." Bummer.. you were so close! You were darn close to being one of the coveted "Good." Your diary is appreciated though, never fear. Good luck and keep safe!
Previous - Next - Back to Top
|
|